I have to apologize for the delay.
I met some friends for dinner. Instead of having the chicken that kissed the walnut, I opted for garlic chicken pasta. Stay far away.
Okay. So. The Bachelorette. Reagan texted me during some of it. Yes. Reagan at Tunstall's Teaching Tidbits. We text. It's new. (Look at the way I'm name dropping tonight!)
She's two hours ahead, though, so she couldn't tell me much. I wouldn't allow it.
And ABC (All Bloggers Communicate about The Bachelorette) didn't fix the time for me last night!!! It didn't come on until 9:00! I was up past 11:00! (due to all of the rewinding)
My lack of sleep was okay, though.
Because this is what I did in school today.
1. Awards Assembly that lasted FOREVER.
2. Math Assessment Review on whiteboards for about . . .
4. Play Practice.
5. Oral Language.
That's it. You don't need to be wide awake for any of that.
Okay. Back to The Bachelorette. Reagan texted that it was a little boring.
And now that I've watched, I agree.
This is what happens when you boycott helicopters. It takes the fun out of everything.
Anyways, the night started off with a one-on-one date with Ryan. He's the Pro Sports Trainer. Lots of you liked him last week because he was good with kids. Instead of jumping off of things or diving into water or flying over something, he had to bake. BAKE! He was a good sport. I like that he talked about his pastor. But mostly, he just made me want a chocolate chip cookie.
Ryan and Emily got all gussied up later and had some live music playing for them. When bands play for the happy couple that just met, I always feel . . . awkward. Like I'm on the date. But I'm not. But it still makes me feel uncomfortable. Because number one, I can't dance. And number two . . . I don't have a number two. I just can't dance. I can do it in my head, but then when I do it live and in person, it doesn't match what was in my head. This happens to me on a daily basis, but mostly with cooking and cleaning and lawn mowing. I'd never heard of that band, but I liked the song.
Group Date: Here we go.
Miss Piggy was funny! She's my kind of girl. I was waiting for her to say "No one comes between me and my man!" and then I remembered she wasn't Rachel. And that this wasn't Big Brother.
Charlie, Charlie, Charlie - the man with the brain injury. Emily was really sweet to him. I don't know what to say about that whole thing. Shrug. Except that I would have wanted to be in all three activities. I love me a microphone.
And the Rainbow Connection? PERFECT SONG TO SING INTO A MICROPHONE! The lovers, the dreamers, and me! (Just found another thing I can do in my head that does not match up when I do it live and in person.)
Emily said she was a proud mama when it came to Charlie pulling through onstage. Um . . . call me crazy, but she's not picking him in the end.
And, truth be told, I thought the whole Muppet thing was corny. Just saying. I can't decide if I'd rather see helicopters. Or death defying stunts. So the couple can test their relationship and see if they can come out on top or if they'll fall in the valleys. Is that how it goes?
Long haired dude???? Did you see his super high ponytail after the Muppets? NO. Stop that.
How is Chris only 25????? He's really cute, but how is he only 25???
She really likes Jef. Skater boy. Duckie. I don't know. Like I said last week, I think I'm missing something. Most likely my youth. Because he looks like a little boy to me.
Kalon, aka dubbed Chopper by Stevie (because Stevie is a cool name, don't you know), is . . . I don't know. What is it? Does he talk out of only one side of his mouth? Like he wants a Vlasic pickle?
If we have Duckie (Skater Boy Jef) from Pretty in Pink, then I think Chopper is Steff (the obnoxious guy played by James Spader).
Joe - the guy who got to fly in a private jet to go to West Virginia to then ride in an old fashioned car - reminds me a little of James Van Der Beek. You know, Dawson. Anyone? Am I the only one?
(As an aside, I would like never to see Emily in her bikini again.)
Let's interrupt the date for some guy time by the pool.
Kalon, just check it. CHECK IT. No one puts being a parent on hold. Got it? CHECK IT. Then mark it off. Then turn it in. AND CHECK IT.
Back to the Joe Date. She didn't pick him. And she felt awful. Tears.
Poor Joe. Maybe he should have CHECKED IT.
Oh well, what are you going to do? She can't keep everybody.
Rose Ceremony: Ryan (Pro Sports Trainer) made her a gift. He said it was like Christmas. Wow. He is so humble and doesn't think highly of himself in the least. Anyways, the gift turned out to be a novel. With a lot of chapters. It was possibly a trilogy, but I don't think the third book is out yet. (I can't fault him too much. I tend to go on and on, too. But I know you people. He just met her.)
I couldn't believe she called Kalon's name first. Gag. That boy better know how to run. Or have some bodyguards. Or the chopper on standby.
Ponytail boy got a rose, too! ????????? We could call him Ponyboy. You know - from The Outsiders?
This is going to be a season of nicknames.
That's pretty much it. I missed the previews for next week. I don't know what I was doing -- possibly brushing my teeth.
After our awards assembly, a set of parents ambushed my assistant principal because I did not give their daughter the Principal's Award for Overall Academics. I just gave their daughter the Principal's Award in Reading. The horror.
My assistant principal had to calm them down, and reassure them that their daughter is the smartest girl in our entire school, and that she is destined for early admittance to Harvard.
Meanwhile, some of my kids didn't receive an award AT ALL this year. Too many kids and not enough awards.
I'm irritated. But I'm letting it go.
Does that stuff happen at your school?