Hallelujah, Praise the Lord, it is Saturday.
I made it!
Today, I’m thinking about Texas and praying for everyone’s safety! A lot of people have asked about my twin and her family . . . they are safe in the Dallas area.
Wow. What a super duper fun day!!! My teammates and I totally scrapped all of our plans and had a Solar Eclipse Day using this fabulous resource from Simply Kinder.
We had inside morning recess because of the eclipse, but it honestly didn’t matter. My kids were SO INTO IT! We made fun head bands, watched a couple of videos, worked on a mini book . . . and then I took each student outside (one on one) to actually see the eclipse.
It was THE COOLEST THING EVER.
Thanks to my teammate, Heather, I had special glasses that were completely safe. So safe, in fact, that when I tested them out, I oohed and aahed over the eclipse, and then proceeded to walk into the door because I forgot to take the glasses off, and I was basically blind (and stupid).
Heather told me that her students’ reactions to seeing the eclipse was priceless and IT SURE WAS.
They couldn’t get over it. Some were absolutely silent and I had to ask if they could see it (they could), other students said things like “COOOOOOOLLLLL!!!!” and some said “I didn’t know it would be like that!”
We were all in awe.
Then, magically, I started taking pictures of them with their head bands on and then I figured out that this day is going to need to be remembered so I took a bunch more pictures so that I can include this in our End of Year Slideshow.
It was seriously A GREAT DAY.
So . . . um . . remember how I said I was all about Yoga and how I was going to do Yoga Burn for the next twelve weeks and do it six times a week and get taller and leaner and stronger and healthier?
Well hahahahaha!!
I was just kidding.
I wasn’t serious.
Ahem.
Alright.
I was serious.
For a minute.
But then my grandma passed away, and when I went into my office to begin my Yoga, I could not get out of my own head. It’s so quiet during yoga. You’re supposed to focus on your breathing and empty your mind and blah blah blah . . . I wanted to get out of my own head and my sadness and the tiredness I was feeling from being emotionally drained and I couldn’t do it while doing yoga.
So I stopped the yoga and walked on the treadmill instead.
And I watched a reality TV show which totally got me out of my head and I felt better.
And now that school has started . . . I have no time. I have no time to watch all of the shows that I want to watch so I have just been walking on the treadmill and watching TV then.
In the morning.
At 5am.
Because knowing that I can go watch an episode of Bachelor in Paradise will get me out of bed. That’s not sad, either. That’s motivation, people.
PLUS. I got an Apple Watch. And it is SUPER motivating. I’m keeping track of the steps and miles that I’ve walked, and the active calories that I’m burning, and it really makes me want to close all of my rings. I mean, if I know I’m going to have a lazy day (probably like today), then I don’t even wear my watch, otherwise it tells me to stand up or breathe or something and I’m like leave me alone, I’m resting and recovering from being a first grade teacher at the beginning of the year, thank you very much.
I was walking twice a day. Before and after school. Because I wanted to close all of my rings (that’s an Apple watch thing). So I was getting in six miles a day on the treadmill and then walking approximately 5 miles a day at school – NO JOKE – and logging about 22,000 steps a day.
This is not an exaggeration or me swinging my arm back and forth while sitting on the couch. I know someone who does that and his name begins with an S and he lives in my house.
I think it’s because our campus is so huge and I walk back and forth to the playground four times a day, plus I only sit down to read a story. Half the time I’m teaching, I stand up or stand on my head or dance or act like a lunatic to make sure I have their attention so that probably counts, too. I also like to do Go Noodle with my kids . . .
Now I’m *just* walking in the mornings and trying to get 5 miles in. I can’t run so I walk for about an hour and 20 minutes at 3.5 miles an hour.
I feel so good when it’s over!!!
And I just watch TV and walk and walk and walk and walk and there you go.
Maybe I’m motivating you??
I’ve motivated Steve on accident because now he’ll hop on the treadmill for a half hour when he gets home from work because we can share our Apple watch information and now we’re in competition.
🙂 🙂 🙂
I usually win.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE my new T-shirt!!
It was a back to school deal on Jane.com and now it’s gone. It took FOREVER to get it. I ordered it at the end of June and I just got it this week. It is no longer available, but sometimes it pops up. I follow them on Facebook and now I’m kind of obsessed with everything on their site.
BUT!!
This T-shirt is currently available and it’s customizable, too! I LOVE IT and I’m ordering one of these, too, because I’m crazy.
You have to order fast, though, because it’s on the “Ending Soon” tab. So hurry!
The book “We Share Everything” by Robert Munsch cracks me up because of the pictures of the teacher.
Look.
The teacher is floating on air. She is surrounded by flowers and birds and happiness. The next couple of pages has her actually FLYING as if she is Mary Poppins.
People.
This is me.
In the morning.
My mornings are TERRIFIC.
We sing and we learn and we’re quiet and we follow directions and I think how lucky and blessed I am to have this class of mine.
I love life.
Life is great.
Look at my little schmoops.
Love.
AND THEN.
We come in after lunch and I feel like this:
FOR REAL.
The afternoons have been HARD.
HARD HARD HARD.
LONG.
TIRING.
HARD.
We talk and talk and talk.
We have a difficult time following the directions the first time.
We are loud.
We interrupt.
We are WILD.
I look at them and I feel as if I’m in the wrong room and I don’t know where my little morning schmoops went.
According to my teammates, I am not alone.
Anyone else?
ANYONE?
I am about to get real.
Like Really Real.
I have a couple of students with heart breaking stories.
And it is killing me.
And I am sad.
I am heart broken.
I am emotional.
I am a wreck.
I am trying to control situations that I can’t. God is God and I am not. I am struggling with that. I am struggling to remember to pray for His strength throughout the day. I just get busy, I think I can do it all, I try to do it all, and then I fail.
I am afraid I am failing my kids, these particular students, my team, the parents, and on and on it goes.
I hit a wall yesterday (and last Friday) where I was trying not to cry in front of everyone and trying not to cry about stupid things because it’s not the stupid things that are getting to me. My internet being down is not a reason to cry.
I know that.
But everything makes me want to cry.
And I’m not someone who cries easily and especially in front of other people. I just don’t.
But yesterday, I cried in front of my assistant principal and then again in front of my teammate. And then again to Steve.
And last Friday, I cried while getting my hair done.
I think it all boils down to two things:
I am tired.
And I can’t control things.
So.
I’m using this weekend to rest and recover.
I’m going to binge watch something on Netflix.
I’m going to take a nap if I feel like it.
I’m going to pray and be quiet.
I’m going to trust in the Lord who placed these kids in my class for a reason.
And I’m going to remember that we are all in this together.
Leaving all sorts of love to all the teachers everywhere!!!
PS I am fine. Really. Please don’t bring me a casserole.
😉
If you haven’t watched Shameless yet, it is on Netflix and it is totally bingeable. I think you would like it.
I understand the feeling of wanting to save a kid here and there. We can’t save them, but we can sneak them snacks and some clothing here and there. And teach them independence. And be a good role model. Doing the best with what you CAN control makes me feel better with those sweet babies.
It is so hard when we can’t fix “our kids” or their families. All we can do is love them while we have them and pray for them all the time. Hang in there and recharge yourself so you are ready for Monday. Monday is day one for us.
Yes, Kristin!! My afternoons are the SAME. EXACT. WAY! ….and my mornings are like that too! I come in so happy ready to make it through the day, and then after lunch…..!! OH my!! I think there was something in their food!!
Any way…..I am still trying to figure out how to make it work…..with God’s help, I can do this!!
You are an inspiration and not to mention a blessing to so many!! You’ve got this!!
I teach first grade as well. My kids are cute, so adorable…and hard. Exhausting. They get harder every year. Their lives seem to get harder every year. Our jobs get harder every year it seems. We still love it. Only another teacher knows what you are feeling. All of this when you are still dealing with such personal loss. So give yourself rest and don’t beat yourself up. You seem like an amazing teacher and sometimes we have to realize we are doing our best and that’s enough at the moment. I will pray for you and all your needs. So sorry for the loss of your strong and amazing Grandma. God Bless.
You are an amazing teacher & have inspired me in so many ways. Just remember to make sure those babies feel loved when they come to school. You can’t fix everything, but you can give them love & stability – something I’m sure they desperately need. Enjoy your weekend – you deserve it!
You can do this! You’re doing all the right things. You’ve got a great partner for support and a great God to make it all better. (Or at least feel like it’s better) God is good all the time. All the time God is good.
Thank you for being you and sharing your heart. I’ve been so tired and emotional this year as well and it sucks that someone else is in the same boat but then it’s nice to know you’re not alone. It’s been a rough start and I know it’ll get better – just have to remind myself every minute!!! Sending you hugs and check out my cssserole board on Pinterest! ?
I’m sorry for your loss. You were fortunate to have had such a strong woman in your life and I know that your grandma was just as lucky to have had you. Find strength in your wonderful memories and use it when you do the best for your students. Again, they are lucky to have you.
Love your writing style. I am now a follower and look forward to future posts.
Take care and have a great school year.
I understand the heart breaking stories. I have that this year and I just try really hard to extra love them. I don’t treadmill walk (two artificial knees) but I lap swim at 5:30. I pray for my family, friends, church, and school-specifically my kids. It makes the laps go faster.
That is perfect!
I love reading your posts. It always helps to know I’m not the only teacher with children who make my afternoons crazy!! We eat lunch at 10:00 – it makes for an unbearably LOOOOOONG afternoon! Right foot-left foot-right foot- left foot… we can do it!!
That is a super crazy long afternoon!
Hi Kristin! I’ve have read your blog for several years and have laughed so hard because someone out there has the same kind of days I have and articulates them perfectly!! (I know I have scared my hubby a few times when I laugh out loud while reading your blog!) I have also shed a few tears when you have shared about difficult things. Today I had to comment because I had several days last week (our 2nd week of school) where I felt like crying for silly things! I, too, have a student who has had great challenges in his 6 years on this earth and it reminds me every day how precious life is. I think my emotions were a mix of tiredness and just plain hurt and love for my sweet students. I LOVE teaching first grade, I’m in year 12, and I soooo appreciate your blog and your willingness to share your wonderful life with us! 🙂
Thank you!!!! And hang in there!
Hugs to you, Kristen! I feel like we are great friends because I laugh at your posts every week and then share them with my husband because I am not the only looney tune out there! Plus, also, one time you replied to my comment on your Facebook post and it was like we really were friends. lol My students also enjoyed the eclipse immensely! I have been walking 20-25 miles a week this summer and cut back my calories and guess what?! It really works. Go figure. My class this year is super talkative and not direction followers. I’m exhausted. I’m sorry to hear how tired you are. I know how difficult it can be when our students have to bear more than they should. Being a teacher is like being in a marriage- for better or worse, but you don’t get to pick your partner! You influence so many lives and they can’t help but influence ours. I hope you felt some peace this weekend and in the weeks to come.
We are great friends!!! 🙂 Thank you!!
Your blog is the one I wait for every weekend. I don’t start school until after Labor Day, but I dread the afternoons as well. They are just so long in the beginning, And I hear you about the heartache for our students…there are usually one or two that tug at my heart even more so. We have to remind ourselves that our classrooms don’t work, if we are tired, feeling grief or just not emotionally ready. I always tell my kiddos that Room 9 rocks when I feel good … so give yourself the time to recoup and rest up. I know your weekend is over now, but enjoy that 5am walk and remember mornings in your classroom are such fun!
Thank you so so so much!!!
Hi Kristin. Your tears hit me right in the heart.
I have read your blog for a couple of years and appreciate your sharing educational ideas as well as your own emotions. While no one teacher can “save” every troubled student, that does not give us license to stop trying! There are so many factors that are out of our control, so let’s work on those that we can have impact on. Starting with BEING THERE for our students; we may just be that one adult in this child’s life who won’t let him/her down. We must do our best to teach them, give them that extra time/attention/book/food/clothing/smile – whatever we can.
So focus, pray, teach, laugh, talk with friends and family, do yoga – or not (I prefer kickboxing or zumba) – and pace yourself for the school year. God put you and these students together for a reason.
Thank you so so so much!
My class loses their marbles in the afternoon, too!!! I keep telling myself it will get better, they will learn to listen and follow directions, and we will get to “first grade” things eventually. My bag of tricks isn’t working on this group so I’m trying a few new things and trying to go at their pace, which is SLOW right now. I have a few sad stories in my class, too, and one has led to lots of testing of boundaries because of the lack of stability at home. I agree that these kids were placed in my room for a reason so we are taking it one (exhausting) day at a time. Hugs to you and everyone else on back to school struggle bus!
Hang in there!! We are in this together!
I thought I was the only one going through all the same things as you and the other teachers
Above. Friday I was crying at school to other 2nd grade teachers I work with then I started crying to my husband who happened to get off work and he brought our dog for the kids to meet and popsicles . I was thinking wow now they are going to get a reward for not listening, not following directions, and talking, talking, talking. Plus we adopted a new reading program which is so hard to figure out where everything is and teachers edition makes me want to scream because it jumps around all over. So now I not only having this group of students that are so low with behavior problems and a few that have been through to much in their young lives . I am rambling I know it will get better the mornings start out good the afternoons are exhausting and I can’t through the curriculum but it will get better I know it will get better for you too. Thanks for sharing. Linda 2nd grade