Well, you people of Blog Land, you Blog Land people, you touched my heart like nobody’s business. I am seriously in awe of your response to my post about Jon. I can literally feel the prayers and I am so thankful for all of you.
I will keep you updated on Jon’s progress but, for now, I want to be able to blog like normal. I want to write about my day, the ideas, the stories, etc. But I also don’t want to appear insensitive.
Jon and his family are on this journey day by day. They are trying to live in the present. That means homework and school and outside activities and Skylanders, etc.
I want to do the same.
I hope I can do that without anyone wondering how I could joke or be sarcastic or smile.
I hope you know I have to joke and be sarcastic and smile.
I hope this is okay.
With all of that being said, I don’t really know how to segue into The Bachelor and Juan Pablo.
Hmmmm.
So.
How’s this?
Me gusta Juan Pablo.
Does that work?
I watched the Sunday night special introduction and was pleasantly surprised. But I didn’t take notes and, seeing as how I’ve been in Common Core trainings for two days, that means I don’t remember anything that happened. Well, other than the Common Core information, of course. That’s rock solid and firmly in my memory awaiting implementation. Obviously.
So let’s talk about last night’s episode!
I was impressed with the smart beautiful girls. My word. Who knew there were that many of us?
Below are the girls that warrant special attention, according to me. Please comment if I forgot someone noteworthy. (I didn’t notes last night either. Common Core training takes the note-taking right out of you.)
1. Flower girl with no shoes. What? What? Um, it’s a cocktail party. And as much as I’d want to wear my pajamas, I wouldn’t. So I think shoes should be worn. Call me stuffy, but at least I wear shoes to a cocktail party.
2. Piano girl??? Really? She had to play her ten second song to show that she writes music for a living? Push. Push. I got it, I got it. No, I got it! Heave. Push.
I have a tip for piano girl: Wait to see if there is a piano at the mansion. If there is, play it. If there isn’t, use your words.
3. Fake pregnant girl.
Well, I have no words. So the tip from above does not apply here.
4. Science experiment girl — sort of cute. I liked it.
5. Pediatric Nurse — I like her a lot so far. I was okay with her gimmick of the heart stethoscope.
6. Soccer Player — eh.
7. First Grade Teacher — well, I wish she wouldn’t have talked to him like he was one of her first graders.
Wait a minute. Shoot.
I feel like I’ve heard that before. It’s kind of ringing a bell. Maybe my husband has said it? Surely not.
I don’t talk to him like he’s one of my first graders.
No . . . not me.
8. Fish hook girl – um, I’m not sure a fish hook is really a gift. I mean, if that was given to me, I’d wonder where the fishing pole was. That’s like giving someone only one sock. Or one twix. Or one peanut butter cup.
Not okay.
9. The dog — has that been done before?
And, yes, I imagined Murphie in that role and it went a lot better.
10. The Red Hots Prescription girl — that was cute! I liked that. I also wanted to eat some Red Hots after that.
11. Opera Singer — she didn’t sing. Thank you. We all thank you.
Haleeeeeeluuuuuuujaaaaaahhhhhhh.
Cocktail Party:
Juan Pablo played music for the girls, they danced, and he even had a photo booth. I wonder if this was his idea or if ABC decided to liven up the party?
Flower Girl’s job was listed as “Free Spirit”.
I wonder if I could list my job as “Stressed and Loves to Eat Chocolate”.
Did the masseuse put oil all over his suit???? I think maybe her job should have been listed as “Nut”.
As in “Nut Job.”
Ohhhhh, the Okie girl.
At the beginning of the episode, her hometown was listed as Edmond. Which just so happens to be where I grew up. Yup.
After she had her little big meltdown, her town changed from Edmond to Oklahoma City.
We are pretty proud people in Edmond. I’m thinking the mayor or somebody else important called up and disowned her or something.
Okie needs to get some therapy to get over her last relationship. Either that, or some ice cream. Oh, and somebody get her some kleenex and then I really hope she remembers to wash her hands.
Then, after crying and carrying on, Okie decided to use her one-on-one time with Juan Pablo to talk about how hurt she is from her broken off engagement. OH HOLY INAPPROPRIATENESS.
She said “I don’t want to lead with this, but I-Have-Issues-Please-Pick-Me-I-Love-You-I-Want-To-Be-A-Stepmom-I-Love-You-Snot-Snort-Deep-Voice-Please-Pick-Me.
Bye, Okie.
Then Juan Pablo fell head over heels with the Opera Singer — he was so impressed!
But then Opera Singer felt let down!! She thought they would have better chemistry.
Maybe Juan Pablo should have taken his shirt off. That might have helped.
He gave her the first impression rose and she hesitated. Actually, she didn’t just hesitate. She waited and waited.
And waited.
And then she accepted it. Kind of in a “I don’t really want to, but there’s a camera on me so maybe I should” way.
Now that was an opera!
At the end of the rose ceremony, we had to say goodbye to the massage therapist, (called it!) the Okie (nailed it!), and an interior designer we didn’t even get to know so I had no way of knowing that one. Not my fault.
It looks like it’s going to be a really good season.
Did you see the tail end of the episode last night? Sean and Juan Pablo’s shirts magically fell off.
I laughed and laughed.
What are your thoughts? Who do you like? Did I miss something important?
I am not going to lie. I never watch the Bachelor…I wasn't even sure what you were talking about at first. But your recap made me want to watch.
I *think* if you write a recap every week, I would probably watch. haha
Ditto!
Learning With Mrs. Leeby
Great recap….but what about the girl who thought Juan said her name. OMG….I would have died of embarrassment…but I thought she handled it well or what the cameras showed! Amber ~ Kindergarten Rocks Blog
Nicely done. I am totally psyched for this season. If it weren't for The Bachelor, I would have to be serious all the time. I live for Mondays!
OMG yes Amber ^^^^ that chick that thought he said Kylie but he said KAT!!! I would have D-I-E-D!!!!! And little opera chick needs to just leave, if she doesn't want to be here already….there's the door!
Oh, yeah- the shirts falling off of those two guys at the end was hysterical! And I kept thinking about you as I was watching the past two nights, too! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! What will Kristen say? LOL!
Heidi
You do know that the name of this month is. . . . Juan-uary!
I thought it was weird that he kept telling Opera girl that he really liked her dress. . . what was there to like? I thought it was very plain and I couldn't tell the real color, but it looked drab to my nonjudgmental eyes!
I took notes too. . . I kind of felt like you. My daughter, daughter-in-law and myself each have picked our top five and have written them down to see how close we are in the end to the actual winner.
On my "loser List" I had Opera girl and Free Spirit! And they got roses. . . sheesh! My fav so far is Renee who lives in Sarasota and has a son. . .I bet she'll be there for a while.
And that girl who cried, isn't she the one who played the piano? She was a sap! Move on girl!
Ok, that's my take on it. Love the show and love your views of it even more!
Patty
Second In Line
Just love your post. As I was watching last night I kept thinking…Oh I wonder what Teeny is going to say about this! So funny…many of the things you said above were the exact things I was telling my husband as we were watching. Especially about "Free Spirit" girl, the massage therapist and the Okie…lol. Can't wait to read next weeks post! Thanks for sharing your wit and humor.
~Laura
Luv My Kinders
Speaking of Okie… wait… as a Californian am I allowed to call her that? I'm going with ….yes…. Okie was 25 years old!?! Really?…. didn't she look…um, well, older than all the other girls!? She acted 25, that's for sure… I love that Juan Pablo kicked off the night with a dance party! Can we PLEASE have a Monday night Bachelor meet up!?! PLEASE!?
Christy
Crayons and Whimsy
I can't believe you forgot the chick who walked up when he called someone else's name. I about fell in the floor. How embarrassing!!!! Hahahaha. At least her hair was pretty.
It's been a few season since I watched the first episode…wow…prego (go home), piano chick (practice makes perfect – she should try it) and flower hippie (I agree – shoes REQUIRED! And get your dirty toes off his suit for goodness sake!). And…lawyer chick kind of freaks me out, but she's super cute.
Kimberly
On a somewhat related note…I went to college in Edmond, OK and lived there for several years when I was first married. We now live in NC.
Small world. 🙂
I LOVE your recaps! You tell it as if we were all just sitting around afterwards and gossiping about all those chickies- I felt for the gal who went up on accident, and then to be sent home at the end (OMG- how embarrasing!), and as far as Opera Girl, you should have just turned down his rose and gone home- or will she turn into a soap opera girl?…… I didn't watch the whole show- just bits and pieces, since we had a snow day on Monday (knew this on Saturday afternoon) AND Tuesday (knew by Monday afternoon), so I was doing some stuff that I was SUPPOSED to finish up during my Winter Break- I enjoy waiting til the last minute- I should have just put that aside until Tuesday night so I could focus on Juan Pablo…Can't wait to see your recap next week!!! Thanks for sharing your wisdom with all of us 🙂
Shar W.
Haha thanks for the funny recap! Totally agreeing with you!
I like to watch the clips from the upcoming season at the end and predict who makes it far…do you think fake pregnant girl and Allie will be there at the end? Hmm
We're you also like me and thinking Juan Pablo looks a lot better than I thought he would!? Good eye candy 😉
Totally agree with you about Okie! She needs to give herself some time to recover after her engagement (she mentioned it was a few months ago! ONLY!) felt bad for her though 🙁
Can't wait for next week!
Elyse
Proud to be Primary
WHY oh why do they pick the fruit cakes to represent Oklahoma?? I am serious evening news, movies, the Bachelor… the Okies are always nut cases!!! I mean come on for heaven sakes we have amazing talent from here, Miss America's have been from here. Carrie Underwood is from here. Reba, Toby, Garth, Blake Shelton…Ree Drummond…ok maybe I'm making my own point…
Tammy (I just live here I am really from Arizona!)