So far, it’s working out for me to keep this up, but no promises. 🙂
I am not ashamed to say that I had the laziest Monday ever. I did “exercise” but after I showered, I put the pjs back on. Then I tried to figure out the whole threaded comment thing and I don’t think mine is working. Which means, I had to try to follow along with Kristen at Ladybug’s Teacher Files on the whole HTML thing. I got about five seconds in and then I was too lazy to go any further. I clicked out. I really want threaded comments, though, because I like the idea of it . . . so I will just have to try on a more productive day. Threaded comment drama did not fit in with all of my Tivo drama.
And, just to clarify, this post will have nothing to do with teaching. It will be about the Real Housewives and The Bachelor. And maybe a smidge of Jersey Shore. So if you’re after some words of wisdom, I suggest you go turn on CNN. 🙂 🙂 🙂
Did you see the previews for the Real Housewives of Orange County??? Woot Woot! Can’t wait for those original ladies!
RHOBH: What in the world was Cedric doing? Really? Just trying to get more camera time? I didn’t get it at all. I believed Brandi when she said she didn’t invite him . . . how about you?
Kim. In the words of someone from the movie, The Green Mile, “I do believe this girl’s cheese has done slid off her cracker” (and insert a big ole southern accent in there). Something is seriously wrong and if the rumors are to be believed, I hope she is in some kind of rehab. She needs it. I thought it was very ironic that Jennifer (Brandi’s dark haired friend that keeps showing up at every party) was waiting for the restroom when Kim was in there doing who-knows-what. Jennifer is from Celebrity Rehab — she was like the Sober House Mother and ran the whole thing. She has great experience with this type of thing but she just stood there. I wonder what Dr. Drew would think about all this. Anyways, I’m starting to mix my reality so I should stop. My head might hurt.
Kim and Kyle. Crying again. Cry, cry, cry. I was really relieved when Kim pulled out the correct lipgloss to share with Kyle. That could have taken a whole ‘nother turn.
And Kim preggers? I don’t think so. I believe it’s called menopause. This exact same thing happened to Caroline Ingalls on Little House on the Prairie. Remember? She thought she was finally carrying the boy for Pa but it turns out she was in menopause. And Kim was on Little House so I thought for sure she would have figured this out.
Taylor and the psychiatrist? Is this normal? Do you think the psychiatrist does this for his other patients? Was he there as a helper or was it a date?
I’m concerned about next week’s episode. I really don’t want to watch Pandora’s wedding for an hour. Only if there’s lots of drama at the reception. I know lots of peeps love a good wedding but it’s lost on me. I got married in Vegas. And the guy that married us looked normal when we did the “rehearsal”, but then when the real thing happened, he came out in a bunch of robes and looked like Merlin. Or a wizard. It really distracted me when I was saying my vows.
The Bachelor: Let’s just start right off with the whole heights thing bringing two people together and if they can overcome this, then they can blah, blah, blah, gag, bleck, I am throwing up now.
For all the girls who ever want to audition for this show, I have a tiny bit of advice: When you fill out the gobs and gobs of paperwork and they ask you to list your biggest fear, you need to say you are afraid of puppies! Or butterflies! Or butterflies landing near puppies! Just saying. I mean, c’mon. This happens every single year!
Ben and Emily climb. And climb. And get bleeped from the censors. It was scary there in the middle. Ben had to kiss Emily to calm her down.
Roll credits.
Oh wait. Not yet.
They make it to the top. Love conquers all. Next, they have to have their romantic dinner. With the fireworks.
Now, roll credits.
Courtney (the 28 year old model) – “Book smart can be a little boring.” Oh yeah? OH YEAH? Well, you’re . . . well, models can be . . . OH YEAH?
(Am I a nerd for taking notes during both shows so that I would remember what I wanted to blog about? Would Courtney say I’m boring?)
Skiing in bikinis? Really?
No, thank you. Can you say that? No one did. No one said, I’ll just stay in my t-shirt and jeans. How come???
I have to say I cracked up and replayed Kacie B. skiing backwards a couple of times. I identified with her. Although, I probably would have been on my butt or my head or something. Or I might have hurt someone.
Brittney left. I think her main problem was that Ben was the Bachelor.
Lindzi, the horse girl, gets the second one-on-one. She is so surprised that Ben has a key to City Hall. She says she doesn’t know who this guy is. Well, you’ve only known him for three weeks so I say that’s a safe bet. And do you think that’s really how her parents spelled her name when she was born???
I have to confess that I LOVE LOVE LOVE the song “This Year’s Love” by David Gray. I have it. I’m not kidding you when I say I have it playing from my iTunes account while I blog this. Truly. Anyways, that’s the song that Ben played on the piano. It didn’t change my perception of Ben. Just made me wish my hubs played the piano. Or that Brad Womack did.
Oh, boy, speaking of Brad Womack. Here comes Shawntel. Were we supposed to believe that Shawntel and Ben had met before? Or just spoken before? I felt a little late to the party. Anyways, when Ben “did the right thing” and was “the man they thought he was” by sending Shawntel home, she said she felt dumb.
Hmmmmm. Well . . . see, the thing is that you . . . you drove across California and then you . . . and the girls were . . . and then Ben was . . . never mind.
Erica fainted. And her lips turned blue. But I really think that was the “amore” tattoo peeking through. She did say that the tattoo artist really “dug it in” there.
Jaclyn cried and cried.
And that’s all.
The end. Until next week. I can’t believe I have to wait a whole week!
I have lots of questions, as you can see. I would love to know your thoughts!!!! What do you think???
Really quick — Vinny on Jersey Shore almost broke my heart. I really do feel bad for him about his anxiety. And then Paulie D.’s face. Seriously – I was SAD!!!
Teen Mom 2 and Tori and Dean are on the agenda for tonight. 🙂 Because I am sick. Obviously. I have a problem. I know. Maybe I need the rehab.
Help me. The more comments you leave, the better I’ll feel!!! 🙂
I love Jersey Shore! And yes, I will admit it lol 🙂
I gave up on threaded comments for now too. Instead I have numbered comments 🙂
Journey of a Substitute Teacher
The drama, the claws, the caddiness all in that room of the bachelor was nasty. I am really glad he booted Shauntel….she SHOULD feel stupid….but don't you think the producers threw her into that episode…she was probably paid a pretty
penny for doing that. But still I watch… And still I look forward to Monday nights, just to know my life is clearly. Ot as dramatic as this show is.
Patty
Can someone just say it? Can we just throw this out on the table? What is up with Taylor's lips?
I think next week I will take notes during The Bachelor-can't decide if I should include only my comments or mine and the comments of the people around me. I think a combo would be best. Loved your commentary-VERY accurate! Thanks for giving me a good laugh once again!
I wish I liked it. I would be able to contribute to soooo many more conversations. But I don't. Boo.
My mom looooves the Real Housewives of anyplace, and the only time I ever watch it is when I go over to her house. As soon as I get there, she goes, "Look what happened on the Housewives! Have you been watching?" and every time I say, "I don't even have cable. How could I be watching?" and she says, "Ok, well, I'll go back a few episodes. What's the last thing you saw?" and I don't remember, so she makes me watch a lot of episodes.
It's entertaining but hard for me to focus on. I am easily distracted if there's no logical plot. Beeyotches be crazy doesn't keep me too focused. lol And their lips are confusing to look at.
Buzzing with Ms. B
To answer your question about whether Shauntel and Ben have met…. I am going to assume they have because the Bachelor and Bachelorettes usually have reunions and they party together. Once you're a part of the show you get invited to these parties. So it is possible that they've talked before and know each other. But I do believe the producers probably brought her in to spice up the show.
I do think the model chic is a little crazy. Do you notice she does that weird lip thing whenever she's going to say something mean or back-handed. I think she tries to use it to seem innocent but it's not fooling me.
And does it seem to anyone else that Ben is already in love with the model. She's the only one that he told "I miss you" to. I am sure this will be great for her modeling career.
I am so glad that I finally found somebody who watches as much reality tv as me! I thought I was going to have to go into hiding! I am always afraid to start talking about reality tv because I am afraid people are going to realize how much I really do know about these shows! But now I am so glad to see that there are other people out there who know just as much as me…I am not crazy (like my mother thinks I am)! I felt bad for Vinny too! He is the nicest out of all of them, and now he is gone:( I thought the skiing in bikinis was crazy!! I think the producers were trying to get men to watch the show. There was so much drama at the Rose Ceremony last night! The fainting, the crying and of course Shawntel. Oh boy…I can't wait for next week, haha:)
Lazy Mondays are a GOOD thing!! (wish you lived close, too…Alabama needs you! lol)
Jennifer
First Grade Blue SKies
Just in case it makes you feel better, my comments don't work either. Well, they work when I use my iPhone, but not on my MacBook. To top it all off, my numbers, have disappeared too. I gave up too… for now. I will eventually tackle it but just not today.
Ms. M
Ms.M's Blog
A Teacher's Plan
Um you so crack me up and I don't even watch any of these shows. So keep up the run-down. I will feel like I watch them. I do like Jersey Floor (Jimmy Fallon's spoof of Jersey Shore) Have a great day!
Laurie
Chickadee Jubilee
Kristen, I am your latest follower and just want to say…. HA! You are so darn funny and I enjoy reading your blog.
Bless your PJ wearin' heart…
Kat
Kristin, After I read your comments last week about The Bachelor, I watched the first two episodes via the internet. The whole time I was watching I could hear your voice giving me commentary. I was laughing so hard. If I hadn't read your comments first, I would not have enjoyed it half as much!! I don't know what your voice really sounds like, but I gave you a really nice voice in my mind -cheerful, upbeat, very California. Now that I read your comments on last night's Bachelor, I can watch that episode too. Thanks friend!
Camille
An Open Door
I.about.cried.
that pertains to when Vinny left.
My heart broke.
I think Vinny is A.D.O.R.A.B.L.E!!!
It was very sad…although- if I had to hear the word anxiety one more time….dude! we get it!
And weird, but those big glasses…..kinda hot on him!
I have to do like camille and watch the others on the internet:)
I didn't hear you mention Mob Wives….I wish I knew those ladies!!!!
I will email you a picture of the taped desks- I'll tag it "desks" in the labels too:)
Staci
Going Nutty!
misssquirrels@yahoo.com
O*M*G You crack me up! I figured that Shawntel and Ben had met at one of the Bachelor/Bachelorette parties but that was all TOO weird! Perhaps Ben has had the privilege of lying on Shawntel's embalming table…bwahahaha! I was thinking the same thing about "your biggest fear"…why would you actually put your REAL biggest fear??? DUMB! And Erika's blue lips, Jaclyn drowning in her own tears, and Courtney has gotta go! I love Kacie B. but maybe that's because she's from Tennessee!
Anyway, your commentary cracked me up! Can't wait to hear your follow up of next week's episode! LOL
On a scale of one to ten, I almost threw up. Haha! Totally stealing that line! I missed crazy blogger chick.
You suckered me in with your Talk About it Tuesdays. So now I watch Bachelor. Oh… those sorry girls. I totally agree with you about the puppies and butterflies. How many times did they have to say, if we could do this there is no end to what we can do… REALLY?
Anyway, thanks for making sure I added something else unproductive into my week. 😀 . . . cuz now I'm hooked. I had to have a clearer picture of what you had me in hysterics over each week. {Guess I'll have to check out RHOBH next.}
As always – you are HIL.AR.I.OUS! Thanks!
♥ Dragonflies in First ♥
Hello, Kristin!
I am totally enjoying your comments about RHOBH. Do you ever watch "Watch What Happens Live" on BRAVO?
I laugh out loud! It's amazing how many celebrities watch the Real Housewives! I'm really enjoying your blog. You are the first blog I check to see if you posted every morning. Have a great day!
I don't watch Bachelor, but I love the Real Housewives. I don't even know Kim, though I feel like I do, but I am worried that there is something very wrong, and I hope that the rehab rumors are true, too.
I also thought that Adrienne was kind of, well, harsh when Taylor was trying to explain what was happening in her life.
Can't wait until next week!
-Megan
First Grade Magic
Uggggghhh I'm having thee same issues with the threaded comments 🙁 I tried everything {blogger's tips & Kirsten's videos} and it just won't work 🙁
What a stink!
Let me know if you figure it out…
❤ Mor Zrihen from…
A Teacher's Treasure
Teaching Treasures Shop
I am SOOOO exited about Real Housewives of Orange County!
Jodi
Fun In First
Bachelor—
Backwards but skiing was the best clip of the show. Model girl's mouth BUGS me but at least there isn't a tattoo in there. Shawntel…that was weird…Blakeley cries because the girls don't like her but she was SO MEAN the first two weeks and that's kind of what happens when you gloat and brag?!
What was up with let's be drama free girl and then she was all about the drama.
The clips for next week look great!
girl. you crack me up! lol. I don't watch either show… ut I love reading your "notes" each week…lol. I do watch Tori and dean though…
You in rehab, me in copyright jail…we are set!
I am pumped for the OC Housewives to start back!! I really need to watch more tv…to keep up with you! hah!
I LOVE talk about it Tuesdays and I love that you don't always post school-y stuff! <3
Stacy
2nd Grade Paradise
I was totally confused by the whole Shawntel dealie. I texted a friend asking "Did I miss something?" They made it sound like they spoke and that was it but man, those girls had an IMMEDIATE and catty response to her being there…if nothing had happened between them, why would they have gone in attack mode so quickly?!?!
I'm watching the beginning right now as we "speak" because I missed it. They are climbing on the bridge right now…yes, agreed butterflies next to puppies…freaks ME out, right?!?
Holly
Crisscross Applesauce in First Grade
As I watch the Bachelor, I totally try to guess what you are going to blog about!! haha. I'm so surprised model girl's comment about "We'd make cute babies." didn't make your cut! I thought for sure that part would make you throw up a little. I know I did.
-Staci
Let's Teach Something
I don't watch the Bachelor, BUT I am OBSESSED with real housewives (all but Atlanta), Teen Mom 2 and Jshore. Your posts are too funny! I wish Vinny was my boyfriend and he was really the main reason I loved the show to begin with.
Follow me if you get the chance!
I don't watch the Bachelor but I watched it the other night bc it was the one big reality show that I wasn't watching that everybody's talking about. As if I need another show to add to the list. While I think all those girls are lunatics for going on the show, This Year's Love on the piano may have sucked me in. Real Housewives… I scrolled down bc I'm way behind. I have lots of catching up to do! Oh & Jersey Shore. I joke that the surprise honeymoon my fiance is planning is to the Jersey Shore. I only half hope it won't really happen. My DVR is an embarassment… I should probably blog about it because last night, I brought up the Kardashians… at my small group!!!! What is wrong with me?? We are studying Sermon on the Mount & I somehow find a connection to the Kardashians?! If you're going to rehab, I'm going too!
Your comments make me feel so much better about my DVR being full of Trash TV…aka Reality TV! When I mentioned RHOBH to someone the other day I got a funny look. My response was "Well, the Teeny TIny Teacher will understand!"
Sunshine, Sand and Scissors
I love your blog! It always make laugh. You should check out the blog ihategreenbeans. She does a wonderful play by play of the Bachelor every week. It is main reason I watch the show.
You did it again, girl!!! 🙂 Awesome, hilarious recap! I can't do Jaclyn…or the girl with the silver circle necklace…I forget her name because she is NEVER shown!!!! That's all I got…you said everything else!!! 🙂
Do you LOVE I Hate Green Beans?????????? Y'all could be sisters for sure!
Oh and about the THING…I got over it. I hate confrontation. The end. 🙂 Ha!
First of all, I have to say, you crack me up every day! One of my most favorite times of the day is when I get home, put on my pjs, and read your blog. So, thanks for that!
Second, I also love reality TV! I don't watch the Bachelor, but thinking I am actually start. That way I can actually keep up with your posts…ha! I do love RHOBH though, and absolutely love Jersey Shore. Watching Teen Mom 2 as we speak now 🙂
Third, I started my own blog, and would love if you would check it out!
http://teacherytidbits.blogspot.com/
Much Love,
Natalie
I have a super big obsession with watching reality TV. It is bad!!! If you find a rehab facility, I need a bed too. I unfortunately enjoy watching the shows on A&E like Storage Wars and Parking Wars (I know uber dork!) I do love Teen Mom though. As a teacher I probably shouldn't support their efforts, but I.Can't.Turn.It.Off!
This Courtney does not think you are boring! 🙂
Swimming into Second
Like so many have said, I don't watch either of those shows but your commentary makes me laugh. I tried to watch The Bachelor but just couldn't get into it…..I wish you watched one of my shows so I could hear your take, your 'voice' makes me smile. Just watched Modern Family and it was a laugh out loud 30 mins. Needed that 🙂 Happy Friday !!
I'm so bummed about the threaded comments – mine aren't working either! I realllllly want it to work! Are we being punished??? If I find anything that works I'll let you know. sadness.
Denise
Sunny Days In Second Grade
I don't think I can watch The Bachelor now without thinking of what YOU must be thinking! =) I think I might even know the parts when you might be rolling your eyes! Here is a fact that makes me a weird-o…I don't have cable. I do Netflix, The Bachelor (at times) and The Biggest Loser.
As always, I LOVE reading your posts and you of course made me smile!
Heather
Heather'sHeart
I am a little late with a comment, but had PVR'd the Bachelor episode and it took me a couple of days to watch it, so I didn't want to read your post. Here is what I was thinking in regards to the surprise appearance by Shawntel…it seemed like they had maybe 'hooked up' but perhaps he didn't call her again, and she was looking/hoping for more. I can't imagine someone driving across the country just over a few conversations.
OMG! I am dying laughing at this post! UMM Yes, RHOBH is one of my favorites! And I agree, I definitely don't want to see Pandora's wedding the whole time next week. Oh, and I've been so worried about Kim!!! And skiing in bikinis on the Bachelor? Yes, that was embarrassing to watch, wasn't it?!
Ok….you are hilarious…..I am right there with you on all the bachelor thoughts….can't wait for the next episode and now to read your recap…..I am new to being a blogger….and am enjoying an evening of blog stalking….thanks for the laughs!
You are so funny!!
I will admit it here.I watch the Bachelor.I cannot stop.I've given up Monday night yoga for it.
Do you give your hilarious commentary/synopsis every Tuesday? I'm so in!
And I love Housewives (OC and BH)…love watching it with my girlfriends and some wine! Best time ever!!!
Kelli