I just had dinner with two friends that I used to teach with . . . it was fantastic, as always. Love those girls. And the food. I had a yummy half sandwich called “The Walnut That Kissed The Chicken”. Or maybe it’s called the “The Chicken That Kissed The Walnut”. Can’t be sure. Plus I had a cup of “Cocky Leeky Soup”. Don’t those titles alone make you want to eat at this restaurant? It’s Rutabegorz. They have lots of healthy items on the menu that I steer clear from, but I can definitely recommend some of their high-fat, high-calorie, high-cholesterol choices if need be.
Anywho . . . I told my friends about how I saved a boy’s life this week. Now it’s your turn.
Last Wednesday, it was early dismissal like always. I walked my kids to the Back Gate in Far Away Land. I had one little left over whose father forgot her whose father was late so I waited with her. Meanwhile, I was worried I was going to be late to PTT and it was Staff PTT, not grade level. So as soon as that father came, I walked veryfastveryfasttrottrottrot down the playground to the far ramp closest to my building, which happens to be near the library, which happens to be the meeting place of every PTT.
It would be a lot better if I could show you an actual picture. All I can think is to have you picture a FOOTBALL FIELD and that’s what I’ve got to get across to begin climbing the ramp back up. (Of course this is an exaggeration, but it IS far. Really. I don’t do feet or meters.)
Here’s a map that I whipped up. So you can see.
When I finally got to the ramp, the gate was LOCKED.
LOCKED. I was locked in the playground.
I shook my head. Growled. Turned around and walkedveryfastveryfasttrottrot half way back to the “middle” ramp of the playground (third and fourth grade teachers tend to use that ramp) . . .
LOCKED.
This was really unusual. I go to the back gate every day at dismissal. I do tend to vary my routes. Sometimes I take the first ramp (for the fifth and sixth grade teachers), other days I may take the middle, and sometimes I just walk to the last one. It really depends on who I see, who I want to see, my daydream, the shoes I’m wearing, the weather, etc. You just never know. But all three gates are always open. Obviously. I’ve got to get back onto school grounds. My purse is there.
So when the middle gate was locked, I was stumped. And panicked. And LATE to PTT.
I debated going to the first ramp (which would make me even further from the library) and then decided against it. (This is PIVOTAL, people.)
Well, I had my keys.
Had you going there for a minute, didn’t I? Did you think I was typing this from the jungle gym?
I was worried my gate key to the grass area (completely different key and not worth discussing) would not open the gate to the ramp. BUT IT DID!
I was FREE. FREE!!!
The tricky part was locking the gate back up. I couldn’t just leave it. I had to lock it back up. Otherwise, I might get in trouble. I guess. I don’t know. But I felt compelled to lock it back up. I had to fight with it. It was not easy. The chain was short and the two gates wouldn’t meet in the middle. . . it was a dilemma, let me tell you. Keys generally intimidate me . . . I am not good with keys.
While I was fighting with the lock, I heard a bang above me, near the playground bathrooms. I looked. Nothing.
I kept fiddling with the lock.
BANG. BANG.
I looked again. Nothing.
Fiddle Fiddle. Faddle Faddle. (Fiddle Faddle sounds good.)
BANG. BANG. “HELP! Somebody help!”
Cue the music. Maybe from Rocky? Or the Greatest American Hero? (Flying away on a wing and a prayer . . . who could it be? Believe it or not, it’s just me!)
Super powers overtook my hands. I locked the lock. Just like that. JUSTLIKETHAT.
BANG! BANG! BANG! “HELP! HELP! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME?”
I flew (Literally. With my cape) up the ramp, up the stairs, and towards the bathrooms.
And, people, it was one of our teacher’s kids. A boy. In the boy’s bathroom. LOCKED IN.
I shouted at him that I had arrived.
NEVER FEAR. TEENY TINY IS HERE.
Once I figured out who it was (I think he’s in fifth grade. Teacher friend who reads my blog, am I right?), I told him I would get help. Actually, first I asked him why he couldn’t just push the door open. He probably thought that was a dumb question.
Then I said I would get help, and to hang on, and we would get him out. (Just for the record . . . no, my key would not open the bathroom door)
So I ran to the library.
People, I can’t run. My heart does not work like yours.
So I would have to stop and rest. (Much like Cameron Diaz in the movie The Holiday when she gets out of the limo to run back to Graham because she finally cried. And as she runs, she stops and doubles over with her hands on her knees? Do you know what I’m talking about? That is a great movie. LOVE. Well, that’s how I did it.)
When I got to the library, PTT was in full swing. I flung open the door (cue volume on the music — crescendo) and . . .
PANT. PANT. BREATHE. BREATHE. GASP FOR AIR. PANT.
Our principal continued her speech (I forget what it was about) and so someone said, “I think Kristin needs to say something.”
Ya think?
So I said,
GASP. GASP. “So and so . . .” GASP. SUCK AIR. “Is locked in . . . the boy’s bathroom.” GASP.
His mom shot up out of her chair at the exact same time as our Assistant Principal. The walkie talkie went buzz buzz and they both ran out.
Confetti rained down from the ceiling.
Everyone cheered. “Hooray for Kristin!”
Later that night, I experienced post traumatic stress disorder from being locked in the playground. But nobody seems to care about that.
Our over-zealous custodian is in a little bit of trouble.
That’s not my fault. I mean, should I have just let it go and not gotten the custodian in trouble?
That’s what I thought.
Real heroes do the right thing. Even if it’s the hard thing.
Roll credits.
My teacher friend who reads this blog (and survived the telling of her son being locked in the bathroom) and I have talked about this. And here’s the thing.
God is good.
I could have used my keys on that last ramp gate. But I didn’t. I walked BACK to the middle gate. And I could have kept going to the FIRST gate. But I didn’t.
Also, that father who forgot his child who was late? What if he had been on time? I would have made it through that last gate and gone to the library.
Do you have chills?
I do, but I think it’s because it’s freezing cold in my house and I need to get my slippers.
Do you have any issues with keys like me?
Oh.My. I am cracking up over here. If someone walked in right now, they'd think I was slightly crazy. You are hilarious and never cease to make me laugh out loud! I'm so glad you had your cape on and saved that boy! 🙂
Second Grade Sugar and Spice
Fiddle Faddle DOES sound good- nice to know I am not the only one who can get sidetracked like that….Greatest American Hero is now stuck in my head! (loved that show- what was it with men and curly hair back then?)
Everything happens for a reason- you getting trapped on the WORLDS LARGEST PLAYGROUND {{{OUND OUND}}}} was in the cards!
Go get your slippers….we'll wait….
Loved seeing you tonight and loved the story….chuckled again so much my hubby wanted to know what was so funny! It was better in person though… I wont forget for a long time how i almost peed my pants while you told it…pant, pant, pant..!
I felt like I was watching a movie .. a really, really good; really, really funny movie! I was cheering you on … Go Teeny Tiny! Run Teeny Tiny! Gather strength Teeny Tiny! Hurrah for Teeny Tiny! She's our hero!
Loved it!
Camille
An Open Door
P.S. I really do love your stories!
Post traumatic stress disorder!!!! Im dying! I can't stop laughing!! But only bc I would have LITERALLY died if I got locked on the playground!!!
Hilarious! I used to have an irrational fear of getting locked in the bathroom when I was in Middle school and had to stay after for clubs and stuff. Glad you were able to rescue that boy!
✪ Miss W
Miss W Teaches
I AM IN TEARS! From….This is ME to scale!!!! … to Everyone cheered, hooray for Kristin!… OMG hysterical.
Thank you, super hero, for sharing this wonderful escapade of courage and valor. And for sending me off to bed LMAO!
Adore you!
❤Traci❤
Dragonflies in First
I am just laughing at your recount! Brilliant! Things happen for reasons, and the lesson is not to question why, just do and wait for that opportunity (that you never saw coming) to smack you in the face! (whether it is a cape or piece to 2×4 depends on your perspective!)
I love super heroes!!! I think you need an outfit….not just a cape;) What a great story and of course hilarious cuz you told it "Teeny style". Will they make an action figure in your honor???? LOL!
4th Grade Frolics
hehe – all I could think of was the teeny tiny mouse super hero from like Looney Tunes or something – do you know who I'm talking about?!? 🙂
♥ Jen
The Teacher's Cauldron
Oh I needed a good laugh today! I think that that the mayor of where you live needs to give you a KEY to the city! Think of all the people you could rescue if you had a key to an entire city!
-Megan
First Grade Magic
Your map is killing me! Hilarious! You are definitely a hero!!!! 🙂 Poor kid would have been stuck in their all night while his parents worried to death that something had happened to him.
Jodi
fun-in-first.blogspot.com
Way to go Super Teeny!
p.s. let's to to the restaurant when I visit!!!
You are so funny!
Jennifer
First Grade Blue SKies
Absolutely hysterical telling of this story! I love the diagram with a picture of you. And your "to scale" comment! hahahah
So glad I had a 2 hr fog delay this morning (yes, we have those where I teach) and got to read this post!
Erin
Creating & Teaching
Creating & Designing
I hope you have written books… or are planning on writing books… You are awesome! Love the way your draw everyone into your stories. Today I'm in a hurry and I really don't even have time to be sitting here…but I am… reading, laughing, and praising God that you were sensitive to the Holy Spirit. Yes, God is good! You, my blogging friend, are a blessing to all of us!
Haha! You crack me up! Poor kid! I am glad you were there to save him! Your school sounds interesting with all those ramps and football field size playground.
I feel for you and for that kid. Getting locked in things makes me shake and sweat. So glad you were able to resolve. Phew!
Kimberley
First in Maine
I am making your cape as we speak to send. Your emblem shall be TTT- Triple T (which is a gas station here in Ok).
Triple T to the Tescue..I mean Rescue! LOL you crack me up. And what a lucky boy and mom to have you around- you are amazing and fun!
Tammy
First Grade @ Klinger Cafe
dtklinger@gmail.com
Oh my gosh, God is good. The teacher mommy would have thought her child had been kidnapped right of the campus! In the end he would have been found the next morning traumatized beyond belief. But that is horrible too. His parents and everyone they know would have lost their minds in the process. Oh my goodness!!!!!!! Yay for Gods hands that lead you to him. Teeny Tiny saves the day!
Cracking me up, Kristin! You have always been my hero…"did you ever know that you're my herooooo…." I'm singing that song to you…you know from Beaches. Give me a tissue. 🙂
You are too funny, girl! Glad you were in the right place at the right time!
❤Teri
A Cupcake for the Teacher
Maybe "teeny tiny superhero" could be a new blog name. You had tears running down my face from this story! Too funny. And then I thought of Anne Shirley who rescued her student from being locked in the bathroom….how many teachers can say they have done something Anne Shirleyish!
Laurie
Chickadee Jubilee
2 things:
We only have 3 keys to our school- one to open the doors to the outside, one to our classrooms and one to the office- I have no gate key. I think I would have been stuck and I would have been the one calling for help and waiting for MY superhero.
AND
They (not sure who they is…) but THEY say that you have to walk the length of a football field to walk off the calories of ONE M&M- so go ahead- eat an M&M (or a whole bag) to reward yourself for the post tramatic stress. 🙂
Love your blog 🙂 (and your witty sense of humor)
-Staci
Let's Teach Something
Kristin! I have issues with keys too! I thought I was the only one! I officially blame my issues on lack of early exposure. I grew up in the country, and we NEVER locked the doors to our house. I didn't even own a key until I got a car at 17.
One time while we were in the library, my high school science teacher gave me the key to his room b/c I forgot something. I actually asked to bring a friend because keys obviously aren't mine. He wanted to know how I could get an A in his class but not be able to open a door.
What can I say? Key finesse…you either have it or you don't, right?
-Jessica
http://findingmyyellowball.blogspot.com/
You are a hoot AND a hero…the next thing we know you'll be swooping in saving people in your helicopter!
Heather
Heather's Heart
I love that movie! Now every time I watch it I will think of you. Could you hear the music in the background as you ran/panted?
-Jenna
Klassy Kinders
I have never lost my keys in my 32 years of teaching, never! Yesterday I went to school early since I didn't go over Spring Break. I couldnt find my lanyard, badge and keys anywhere whe I got to school. Did I take them out of my purse during break! Not in purse, dumped on my car seat, searched the car, nothing! So I went in the day care door, I couldn't wait for the office to open, I had to go the bathroom. I found our building manager to unlock my door, there on my desk were the keys, whew! I guess in the rush to get away for Break I left them on my desk, the custodian was cleaning so I let him lock up. See, after 32 years I still haven't lost my keys, sort of!
Ok is it weird BUT I am NOT laughing I am having a slight case of anxiety b/c just the thought of being trapped… you first then the boy… I think about how scared he must have been and then I thought OH MY GOSH DON'T run Kristen DON'T RUN!!! I was having panic attacks just reading through this… I am so glad everything turned out OK and I need to go take a chill pill to calm down!!!!
it should be don't run KRISTIN.. not KRISTEN…. my cousin's name is KRISTEN and she has a heart condition too and can't RUN!!! so glad you were a hero!!!
I remember Greatest American Hero! I am picturing you in his costume! Hope you are turning these posts into a book!
Laura
Peace, Love, and First Grade
Look at you, using your noggin'…I'm proud of you, I would have panicked and scaled the fence – ripping something or breaking something else. Oh how, oh how will your teacher-friend repay you? Jelly Bellies perhaps? Or Margaritas?!?
Holly
Crisscross Applesauce in First Grade
Oh no! I feel sure you need a jeans pass or two for saving his life!
Rowdy in First Grade
You will always be that little boy's hero! 🙂 Your blog is hilarious…thank you!! I'm having a beginner's giveaway for my first 15 followers on my new blog! Come on over and get my free Literature Circle Packet! 🙂
Rachel
A-B-Seymour
STOP IT!!!! You are a REAL. LIFE. SUPERHERO. Teeny Tiny to the rescue…let me tell you that Mrs. B would have run in the opposite direction! I am so easily freaked out! HA! I am so super impressed with you keeping your cool…
Castles and Crayons
We need to make a super-teacher button for you! God is good.
lolololol!!! I am crying!! And I love The Holiday too, got that reference!